Thanksgiving is in eight days (Or is it nine? I’m never sure if you’re supposed to count today, or the day it falls on. I need a lesson on that.)

Given that the big Turkey Day is sometime next week, I’ve been a little more reflective than usual. Okay, I’m always reflective. But I have a socially acceptable excuse to be such at Thanksgiving time.

At the end of the year, as the shadows grow long and the plants withdraw into the earth, our hearts, too, return home for a season of rest. Yes, the hustle and bustle still calls (the bird is not going to stuff itself!), but in between gift wrapping marathons and dusting the floorboards (do people still do that?), we get a chance to take a look around us at what really matters.

I need to take a moment and make an admission. In my time of reflection, I have come to the conclusion that I’ve missed the mark. I’ve been chasing after “stuff” and neglecting the “who” I love, far too often. I have a beautiful and tidy apartment filled with expensive matching dinnerware and a walk-in closet bulging with designer handbags.

And I have no one to share them with.

I would rather have the sticky handprints of my nephews all over my high-end stainless steel appliances than hear the echo of my polished heels in an empty hallway. I would rather have $29 bath bombs accidentally flushed down the toilet by my innocent little niece, who just couldn’t help herself, than snuggle into an empty pillow at night.

My husband and I never had biological children. Many years have passed since well-meaning strangers asked in the grocery aisles, “Why don’t you have kids?” The answer is: because we didn’t. Just that simple.

We didn’t.

Now, the ship has sailed, and we’re settling into our mid-40s, child-free, exactly five states away from our closest family and friends. We have built a life here in Texas that we love, and we don’t regret one minute of it. But, sometimes we pause.

Did we miss it?

The Lord is gracious and merciful in restoring all that has been lost, even if we didn’t know it was missing. Whatever “it” is. For us, it’s family and friends close to home. We’ve been blessed to have family come from up north and visit us, and we’ve established some new relationships at our church. We have friends that we call “family” all over the country. The Lord has blessed our empty nest with plenty of people to bless. Struggling teenagers who need a place to stay during a weekend retreat. Neighbors who need a cup of coffee and a chat with a listening ear. Office staff from the building who need a kind word in their stressful week.

We have not been blessed with biological children, but our life is now far from empty. See, we were willing to take the risk and open up our hearts to the needs of those around us. We firmly closed the door on self-pity and decided to love our neighbors as ourselves. And the honor has been all ours.

Come and join us for Thanksgiving dinner. We’d love to have you. We have the matching china.